My reading

So far the past couple weeks (all of them except the first two) I have really been slacking on my reading. However, this weekend I kicked my reading skills into overdrive. My problem with reading before was that i just read painstakingly slow. Like 3rd grade level slow. Like "Ahh that was quite a nice hour long read, how much land have we covered Jim Jam.... 10 whole pages, golley gee what an achievement. So in search of a way to fix this issue I did what any man in my shoes would do, sit on the internet and browse through silly pictures of cats until all of my problems go away. Then suddenly, there was something that was not a cat, it was a post about reading faster.I was like AWWW YEAH, and then the wonderful power of the internet directed me to this website called http://www.spreeder.com/ where i learned how to read SUPER FAST. If you go there, you should click on the "Click here to speed read this introduction" to check out how pro you can be at reading. After that you should click the "The Application" button at the top of the screen and paste in any text from a book you want to read. What I did was download a book and then paste a giant section of it into the speed reader thing, and then BAM Jim Jam is reading like a boss at 300 words per minute. I read for an hour today, but the bad part is that my shamefully downloaded book does not contain the page numbers written in the corners. To quell this issue, I used my extra special skills with the google machine to discover that the average number of words per page in a book is 250. So then using my proficiency with the calculator program on my computer I was able to find out that I read SEVENTY TWO WORDS IN ONE SITTING. I then proceeded to fist pump triumphantly in a manner reminiscent of the "Nintendo sixty four kid" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFlcqWQVVuU).
So yeah Mr. Hill, prepare yourself because I'm fittin to overtake those reading leader boards with my all new secret speed reading weapon.